Prenup Season Is Here: 6 Things Marrying Couples Should Know
Engagement season may peak over the holidays, but in many ways, “prenup season” begins in early spring and runs straight through the summer.
If you are newly engaged (or planning a wedding), you have probably heard more about prenuptial agreements in the past year than ever before. They come up in conversations with friends. They show up on TikTok. They are casually referenced in podcasts. For many couples, the idea of a prenup brings up a mix of emotions — curiosity, discomfort, and sometimes even fear that raising the topic will send the wrong message.
Here is the truth: a prenuptial agreement is not a prediction that your marriage will fail. It is a tool for clarity. It is a way to make sure that both people understand what they are building together — and what they are each bringing into the marriage — while things are still calm, cooperative, and rooted in love.
If you're considering a prenup, here are six things every marrying couple should know before getting started.
1) Prenups are not only for the ultra-wealthy
“Neither of us has assets. Why would we need one?”
Prenuptial agreements are not only about protecting wealth. The greatest value a couple can gain from the prenup process is clarity. A well-written prenuptial agreement protects what matters AND prevents confusion later.
Many couples get married without understanding what the law says about their rights and obligations to share income, assets, and debts with their spouse, and how those things would be handled in the event the marriage breaks down.
The prenup process inherently involves understanding how the law would apply to your assets and whether income would continue to be shared post-separation. For example, it involves knowing how (or whether) you will be able to afford living in your home in the event of a breakup; whether you will be sharing in the growth of a business or retirement asset; and, to the extent you will need to secure those things, a prenuptial agreement is your answer.
The one major area you cannot agree to in advance with your partner is anything involving the custody and support of your future children. Understand that the courts are only bound by the child’s best interests after an evidentiary hearing and are not obligated to enforce terms agreed to in advance by the parents.
2) In many marriages, the issue is not wealth — it is complexity
In New York City especially, many couples are navigating financial lives that do not fit neatly into one paycheck and one savings account.
We regularly work with clients in the startup space, private equity, hedge funds, real estate, tech, and in the C-suite — and one theme comes up repeatedly: the finances are complex even when the relationship is simple.
For example, one spouse may have:
Startup equity that has little value today but significant upside later
Carried interest or profit-sharing that will not be realized for years
A compensation structure where a large portion of income is bonus-based
A business or professional practice with unpredictable growth
Family money tied to trusts, gifts, or inheritances
Without a prenup, couples often leave major questions to be decided later — at a time when emotions are higher, and the stakes are greater. A prenuptial agreement allows couples to define expectations now, while they are still aligned.
Example: One spouse works at a startup and has equity that may or may not become valuable. The other spouse works in a more traditional role with a steady salary. A prenup can help the couple decide — in advance — how to treat equity that is granted before marriage but vests during the marriage, or equity that is earned during the marriage but will not pay out for years. If the titled spouse is looking for waivers, the couple can also consider ways to shelter the income and savings of the partner with the more traditional role. Without an agreement, couples are often surprised to learn how complicated these questions can become later.
3) Timing matters — and earlier is always better
If there is one practical takeaway from this entire article, it is this: start early.
A prenup should never feel rushed. And it should never be presented at the last minute. Ideally, the conversation begins well before invitations go out, deposits are paid, and wedding planning is at full speed.
When couples wait until a few weeks before the wedding, it often creates unnecessary stress. Even if everyone has good intentions, the timing alone can create pressure — and pressure is the opposite of what you want in an agreement that is meant to feel fair and thoughtful.
We like to tell couples to pretend their wedding date is at least four weeks earlier than the actual date, so that the final details are inked well before the last dress fitting. If you're getting married this summer, spring is the perfect time to begin.
4) Real estate is often the most practical issue — and NYC makes it even more so
For many couples, the most significant asset is not a bank account or a brokerage account. It is the home.
In New York City, real estate is often not only expensive — it can be life-altering in a divorce. And we frequently see the same scenario: one spouse enters the marriage with substantially more resources, or with property purchased before the relationship.
The reality is that after a breakup, it can be financially difficult, and sometimes impossible for a non-monied spouse to maintain the same standard of living or even remain in the same neighborhood.
A prenup can help couples address questions like:
Is the marital residence separate property or marital property?
What happens if the marital residence is sold during the marriage?
If one spouse stays in the home after a separation, how is the other compensated?
Will a mortgage need to be refinanced?
How are down payment contributions treated?
If the couple buys together, how are unequal contributions handled?
These are not romantic conversations — but they are deeply practical ones that need to be addressed in advance.
Example: One spouse owns a condo before the marriage, and the other spouse moves in. Over the years, the couple has used marital income to renovate the apartment and pay the mortgage. A prenup can clarify what happens to the condo (and the value added to it) if the marriage ends — rather than leaving that issue to become a major point of conflict later.
5) Some provisions are popular online — but do not work well in real life
Social media has created a lot of confusion about what can go into a prenup.
People often ask if they can include “behavior clauses” — things like consequences for cheating, rules about weight gain, requirements about intimacy, or agreements about how someone will behave during the marriage. While these ideas may be popular online, they often do not translate well into enforceable legal agreements. In many cases, they can create more problems than they solve.
A strong prenup is not built around punishment. It is built around financial clarity, transparency, and fairness. If you are considering a prenup, the best approach is to focus on what the law actually supports and what will stand the test of time.
Example: We often speak with couples where one person wants a prenup that “protects” them if the other spouse is unfaithful. Even if that feels emotionally satisfying in theory, fault-based provisions can complicate the agreement and distract from the real purpose: financial clarity and stability.
6) The best prenups are created through a respectful process — including separate attorneys
One of the most important parts of the prenup process has nothing to do with the terms of the agreement.
It is about the process.
For a prenup to be taken seriously — and to be enforceable — it must be created in a way that is fair, transparent, and free from pressure. That typically means:
Both parties have enough time to review and negotiate
There is full and honest financial disclosure
The terms are not unconscionable
Each party has its own attorney
Having separate attorneys is not about creating conflict. They are about ensuring that each person has the opportunity to understand the agreement, ask questions, and make informed decisions. It is one of the clearest ways to protect both parties and the agreement itself.
A final thought: prenups are about intention, not pessimism
In our work, we often see couples walk into the prenup process nervous — and walk out feeling calmer, clearer, and more aligned.
A well-crafted prenuptial agreement does not replace trust. It supports it.
If you are getting married this year and you have been thinking about a prenup, consider this your sign: now is a great time to begin the conversation — thoughtfully, respectfully, and with the guidance of experienced counsel.
Because the best prenups are not written from fear. They are written from love, maturity, and a shared desire to build something lasting.
Email us at consultation@artesezandri.com if you would like help this prenup season.